The Foundation for Perpetual Subversion: XAV’s Story

    People have continually asked me about my beliefs, and if I haven’t made it clear yet, I’d like to briefly clarify. I consider myself a fairly devout New Age Evangelical Quasipostculturist (with a philosophical bent toward pacifistic masochism), and as such am ardently opposed to anything that might be remotely considered anything resembling Convention. I have always sought to fight stereotypes, tropes, preconceptions, expectations, vague estimations, and general statistical trends, and fervently promote demographical information as personal identity. So needless to say, when I stumbled upon The Foundation, it was an epiphany.

    Twas a dreary Monday morning, and I watched the rain cleanse everything below from the attic window as I idly gnawed on the fresh remains of an unfortunate rat. Slumped over the back of the creaky old wooden chair, forehead resting on the icy cold glass, I tried not to think about the computer behind me, nor the blank document in the open wordpress tab. I tried not to think about my writer’s block, or my loneliness, or my worsening hygiene (there’s no shower in the attic and the closest I’ve gotten is licking myself like a cat), or the worrying dip in the local rat population since the keeper stopped bringing me my stale Cheez-It® rations.

XAV Free Range

EDITOR’S NOTE: XAV is a free range blogger and is clearly lying about his treatment to get more entitlements.

    I was at rock bottom, and I knew it. I couldn’t even summon the enthusiasm to bang my fists against the window and scream for help when I saw people pass by (which I had long since learned to be futile anyway, given the room’s thorough soundproofing). As I eyed the rusty butterknife I had layed on the windowsill and began contemplating the unthinkable (which unfortunately didn’t go anywhere, since I couldn’t think of it), I heard the telltale beep of an facebook notification.

FB Convo- The Foundation

    We continued talking long into the night. It was an eye-opening experience, particularly when it turned to the omnipotent force behind the despicable evils of conventions and tropes, and the sinister truth behind so-called ‘moderates’…

This Testimony can be read in its entirety (with additional subliminal messaging) on The Foundation’s Official Website.

The Foundation for Perpetual Subversion

“Making the Challenging of the ‘Norm’ the Norm.”